An attempt

[Farler]

Ok this is something written a LONG time ago, the grammar is off a bit. All I need is to know if it's good enough for me to pick up writing again. Im not an artist Im just someone who can take a fantasy and elaborate on it.

This was the history of the world I was creating and more or less the first chapter.


Airea, the world of the great green sky. In the beginning the men lived upon the cliffs no one knew how man came to live upon the cliffs, no one cared, it was a land of waterfalls and peace. Peace because nearly every village was isolated from the other by great chasms. The men knew there were other villages but there was no need to cross the chasms, water carved out caves for shelter, cliff jumpers, a bipedal creature with long sticky fingers and a muzzle similar to a dog’s capable of jumping great distances, and great birds, huge black birds with four wings and no legs, supplied meat, for eating, and skins and feathers, for clothing. It was paradise.

All this changed when the village of kantan, the most populous village situated on the largest cliff top, discovered the airana gas. A non-volatile gas much lighter than air. They used the gas to create the first bird net made of vines and animal stomachs filled with airana. It took the might of all the village’s hunters to hold the net in place while the village women and children secured the net’s ends beneath piles of rocks. The nets succeeded in capturing nearly all the great, and many of the lesser, birds thus overfeeding the kantanen and starving the other villages. After three seasons of diminishing numbers of birds and near starvation the elders from the villages of branton, recise and hewmat decided to send their hunters to investigate the sudden lack of birds. All three villages built a bridge to the nearest neighboring cliff. The bridges were to say the least unpredictable in their effectiveness but all three villages had made contact with a neighbor, branton reached janen, recise reached ambrose, and hewmat reached tazan. Only to find that each neighbor was suffering the same famine, and so more bridges were made eventually conecting 11 villages who were all suffering a similar famine all, that is, except the village of sarck, who had noticed that the birds had lessened but had enough to feed themselves.
When questioned if they knew what the cause of the missing birds was, the sarcken hunters guided the hunters from the other ten villages to the edge of their cliff from their the others saw for the first time the bird net, entangling the great birds. The other villages built the final bridge. The hunters pleaded with the kantanen to bring down their net and share the meat and feathers with the other villages, but the kantanen had already grown fat and greedy and so refused. Most of the hunters decided to return to their villages and decide what was to be done about the net and the kantanen, but some hunters decided instead to take immediate action. The few hunters snuck back across the bridge in the middle of the night and cut the bird net loose and killed Kantan’s leaders in their sleep. The hunters burned the bridge to Kantan behind them. In the morning the hunters told their respective groups what they had done, some were met with scorn and disgust others with admiration and appreciation for their heroic actions.
The sarcken elders, though displeased with the actions of the hunters, decided it was not their place to pass judgement on people from another village and so sent the hunters back across the bridges from sarck. Each hunter returned to their village of origin, the hunters told the tale of the bird net and the greedy kantanen. Each village welcomed back their hunters even the ones who had acted as assassins, but only the village of hewmat truly embraced what the assassins had done. Many of the hewmates wished to experience that some of their hunters described the excitement of holding another man’s life in their hands. The hewmate elders decided that cutting loose the net and killing the elders had not been enough all the kantanen needed to die. All the villages needed to unite beneath the eyes of the hewmates. The hewmates sent hunters across their bridges to tazan to reason with the taznese, to make them see that killing the kantanens and bending their knees to the hewmates. When the tazanese refused to be enslaved to any one. The hewmate hunters drew their weapons and attacked the tazanese but were greatly outnumbered and beaten back across the bridge. The bridge was burned and broken and from their cliff the tazanese shouted that no bridge would ever be again allowed to reach the village of tazan. The tazanese sent their hunters to tell of the madness of the hewmat village. the villages, upon hearing the story, wished frantically that they could return to the peace they once had, and so the bridges between the cliffs were burned and broken in the hopes that isolation would bring peace.
But the hewmates and kantanen would not have peace, the hewmates craved dominion and the kantanen wanted revenge. The hewmates and kantanens each built bridges in an attempt to reach the other cliffs but each bridge was burned or broken before any hunters could reach another cliff.
Most of the villages continued to expand and live without knowledge of the constant struggles on the far sides of the cliffs, many of the villages also found caverns that were filled with airana. The villagers did not no what to do with the gas they could create great bird nets but knew that if they did this they would starve the villages around them. The village of ambrose decided to use the gas to hone their bird hunting skills they attached wooden targets to a 25 foot vine, tied one end to a tree and the other to a cliff jumper stomach filled with airana and took turns shooting arrows into the targets. At some point an arrow missed its target and cut a target vine free, the vine drifted up and away from ambrose towards the village of hewmat where the end of the vine became entangled in the branches of a tree. a group of hunters found the targets in the tree and were inspired, if they could not build there way into tazan they would fly over top and drop down on them.
The first attempt at flight was less than successful, the vessel they constructed was capable at lifting five hunters several feet into the air but was at the complete mercy of the wind and had no way to land. The elders of the hewmat thought that the solution lied in watching how the great birds moved through the air, but when they attempted to reproduce the way the birds moved they failed, they were once again at the mercy of a strong wind. The solution came from watching the way the fish in the streams and pools moved against the strong currents; the hewmat created the first oars, large fans made of branches with skins stretched between them. With a crew of strong-armed hunters, the first flying vessels were no longer victims of the wind, but still needed a way to land. Since landing was impossible without cutting the stomachs free which would leave them stranded on the wrong side of a chasm. The hunters opted instead to simply moor themselves to a tree, by dangling a man clinging desperately from a vine the man would grab onto the tree and quickly tie the vessel to the tree. A five-man team of hunters was sent up in the vessel in the dead of night and told to kill the largest hunters they could find, before returning to the village of Hewmat. The hewmate hunters were successful in crossing into tazanese territory and hooking onto a tree but had been spotted by the patrols that had been set up by the tazanese to stop the hewmates from building bridges at night. The tazanese killed the hunters before they could draw their knives. After the nighttime attack the tazanese finally resigned them selves to the fact that the hewmates would never let them live in peace. Bridges to other villages were built once more only one unarmed hunter was sent across each bridge to inform the other villages that there could be no peace on the cliffs and so the tazanese were leaving.
The villages took this news with disbelief, there was no way down from the cliffs it was too steep to climb and no vine would ever reach the bottom. The villages were told of the flying machine that the hewmates had built, each village sent an emissary to see this flying ship. The tazanese explained how they would build great vessels and fly away from the cliffs and if they truly wished for peace they would do the same. It was decided that the kantanens would be the only ones, other than the hewmates, left behind For five years the villages all united in building the great ships all the while keeping constant vigil against attacks from the hewmates. Each village had its own ships and each village would have it’s a land to call its own. The villages set off in ten different directions.
The hewmates attacked again the night after the ships set sail, and were surprised to find the village abandoned, they returned to their own village to tell their elders of what they found. The hewmates built bridges successfully for the first time in many years only to find their enemies gone. They made their way across the bridges that the other villages had found pointless to destroy, and found all the villages deserted. The hewmates were confused but unconcerned they had become the lords of the cliffs all that was to ascertain what had happened to the kantanens. The hewmates built bridges to the kantan village. The kantanens were confused but very glad after years of trying to reap their revenge their revenge was coming to them. The hewmates, seeing that thee were still some people other than themselves left on the cliffs, poured across the bridges shoutin with their weapons held high. They were however greatly outnumbered and slaughtered by the kantanen. When the kantanen were finnished with the hewmates they venturd forth across the bridges and found the other villages abandoned, the kantanen thought that the hewmates had killed the other villagers. With all their enemies dead and he sweet taste of revenge upon their lips the kantanen started to remake the bird nets, they would need the food for their new nation. Meanwhile each of the ten villages had found a new land to call their own, they constructed villages over the years the villages expanded, the technologies advanced, and each village became a country. But their would be no peace, for the villagers were no the only men of the world many of the countries expanded too large and came into contact with the other men of the world. This contact would often erupt in conflict and blood shed. As the countries grew larger they started to experience crime, with the invention of money crime and poverty increased in severity. Peace, it would seem, was lost from the world of Airea.
.

[Farler]

Airea, the world of the great green sky. The sun people lived in the grasslands and deserts of the east. They lived upon the plains and in the woods of the north. They lived by rivers and lakes and great mountains. Territory was plentiful, the people were happy basking in the bright sun, there bodies blackened and browned by the sun’s warm light, and though wars between the different tribes were not unheard of, they were never a common event. When the cliff people came the sun people met them with suspicion. “ We seek a home,” The cliff people said “a land where we may live our lives in peace.”
The first tribe had not ventured far from their home, they were told by the sun people that they would find no home here, that thy should turn back. So the first village did, they turned back and settled at the northern base of the cliffs.
Further north the cliff people were told of a land of great beauty and plenty, but this land would become cold and desolate. The cliff people decided that this land would be their new home, four tribes set their sights upon the far north. Three tribes prospered in the north the fourth was swept away by the frozen winds, frozen and forgotten.
In the east the cliff people were told that peace was what all men sought, the sun people embraced the cliff people as brothers in peace and welcomed them to join their village.
In the south the cliff people were chased away by the sun people, so they ventured further south. They found the land to be dry and sandy, the cliff people thought of turning back, but knew they could not. So they continued onward and were greatly rewarded. They found oases of beautiful water, it was a beautiful but lonely land, and they loved it, for they were a beautiful and lonely people.
In the west, the cliff people were not met with suspicion, but outright hostility. The sun people attacked them, but these cliff people had been the greatest hunters among all cliff people. The battles were bloody and vicious but quarter was given to all that requested it. The two peoples started to grow a great respect for each other, the sun people stopped their attacks and the cliff people settled into their new home.
The last two tribes went farthest from their home. They traveled until they were at the edge of the great green water and then they went farther. The two tribes each settled upon an island. The islands were warm, lush and peaceful in the daylight but at night, at night the islands whispered to the cliff people. They whispered betrayal, bloodshed and of a great snake god. At first each tribe considered leaving the isles but they found that when they reached the edge of their respective islands, they found themselves compelled to stay. The whispers grew louder and clearer each night. During the night of the 9th day the islands whispered that a sign from the snake god would appear where the two largest islands came closest together.
Each tribe found a hill overlooking the point where the islands were in sight of each other. The tribes sat and watched and waited, in total silence, no birds called out no insects chittered no snakes hissed. The people were unsure of what it was they waited for, but knew it was coming soon. The people saw dark shapes moving in opposite directions towards the isles, the shapes came closer, became clearer, and larger much larger. The ocean churned and frothed as two great serpents shot out of the water. 100 feet long, each serpent was green with black lines criss-crossing down its back. One hundred wings ran down each side of the serpents, pumping with the effort of keeping the great beasts aloft. These were the leviathans, the favorite among the snake god’s children. The leviathans crashed in mid air, as mouthfuls of fangs dripping venom, ripped into each other. Wings were torn off, blood seeped from great gaping wounds the leviathans clashed again and again roaring and hissing. The fight ended suddenly when one of he leviathans grasped the other around the throat, it bit down hard and let the other one drop into the ocean. Bleeding profusely the victorious leviathan dove into the ocean and resurfaced its wings regrown its flesh restored and many times larger. The message was clear, only the strongest could win the favor of the snake god. Each tribe returned to their village, there they found spears, arrows, knives and axes coated in thick black venom. That night they heard the whispers of the snake god, in nine days they would meet upon a desert island, all able-bodied men and women would meet in combat to decide who were the true chosen of the snake god.
On the ninth day the two tribes met, they spoke no words, no words were needed, without warning the battle begun arrows flew across the battle field, axes and spears were raised limbs were hewn off, men and women were stabbed and killed. The battle ended as suddenly as it began four men and five women were all that who were left alive, a strange light glowed in the eyes of the slain of their tribe, the survivors noticed the same glow in each others eyes. The living dragged their dead into the ocean, leaving the others where they lay, before diving in them selves. When they emerged from the ocean their resurrected tribe mates surrounded them. They had all been changed by the will of the snake god, their lost limbs regrown and wounds closed. Where once their skin had been white, it was now yellow. Where once their eyes had been brown or blue, they were now all bright emerald green. Where once their hair had been blonde it was now black. They went forth to the village of the vanquished and found the old, young and the expectant mothers all with glowing eyes, they were all immersed in the ocean and became the snake god’s chosen, the same was done in their own village. They were no longer the cliff people, they were now the snake god’s new favorite children.
And upon the cliffs life continued as it always had, the tribe of the last true cliff people were oblivious to the goings on of the rest of the world. However they had started to grow restless a thirst for exploration was growing within them.
The world of Airea was now divided. In the north the cliff people established the kingdom of Sarck and the sun people established Hanema and Jory. In the far north the cliff people established Angeil, Branton and Recise. In the east the cliff people joined with the sand people to established Tanzan, while the rest of the sand people established Hazen. In the south the cliff people established the kingdom of Ambrose. In the west the cliff people established Janen, and the sand people established Lorai and Vis. upon the cliffs the kingdom of Kantan continued to thrive, and on the isles the empire of Hassse rose from the sea. The old way of following a council of elders was dead, replaced by the ruler ship of kings and queens. Stone weapons gave way to steel. Animals were trained and domesticated, and great castles and walls of stone were raised to protect the kingdoms.

[Plunder Down-Under]

*claps*

Only thing I would suggest are paragraphs, other than that, its good I wanna see where it goes.

[Farler]

*claps*

Only thing I would suggest are paragraphs, other than that, its good I wanna see where it goes.

yes. Paragraphs, it also needs the grammar cleaned up and some other things. See you should never start writing something when you're feeling too lazy for proper grammar since it's such a pain in the ass to go over it again.
This is actually part of a word document that's 10 pages long, Ive got charachter outlines, story outlines, excerpts from lines of dialogue and events that I wanted to integrate. And the climax (not the full ending but the climax)